10 Mistakes You Should Not Make in a Child Custody Case
Your child is precious to you. Even though you might have separated from your partner for a certain reason, you may want to retain custody of your child. However, child custody legal battles can test your emotions, and you might commit mistakes and ruin your chances of winning the case.
So, note the 10 things that you should never do during a child custody battle:
1. Disrespect Your Partner or Their Family
We know you might have grudges against your ex-partner or/and their family. However, in court, you should respect everyone. The judge will closely observe your behaviour towards your ex-partner and associates. If they find you too aggressive or emotionally weak or see you’re rude to your partner, they may think you behave similarly towards your child. Consequently, they might award custody to your partner. Hence, try to remain calm and composed during and after legal proceedings.
2. Involve Your Child in the Battle
No matter how old your child might be, separation or divorce will be a traumatising experience for them. While you and your soon-to-be ex-partner might be on bad terms, ensure you don’t pass on the tension to your child. Otherwise, it’ll make them more stressed and depressed.
Avoid telling them the details about the case, and don’t involve them in the proceedings unnecessarily. Instead, keep them distracted and make them realise the proceedings won’t affect your or your ex-partner’s love for them. Tell them it’s just a process, and no matter what happens, the other parent will frequently visit them.
3. Disrespect Court Orders
If you’ve decided to bring your marital issues to court, the judge will make the decisions, not you. Therefore, you must completely show regard for and respect the court’s judgement. For instance, sometimes, the court issues temporary orders in custody or divorce cases. Make sure you respect and follow them. Don’t ignore these orders. Otherwise, it could hurt the final judgement.
Also, ensure you follow the court’s schedule for child support. Don’t be late, and don’t reschedule things on your own. If you can’t reach somewhere, inform the other parent on time or beforehand.
4. Ignore Important Evidence
You’ll need evidence if you want to win the custody case. Without it, you can’t prove why you should care for your child instead of your partner. So, no matter how strong your stance might be, you should always keep track of information you can possibly use as evidence. This includes call records, bank statements, text messages, and other useful documents.
A good lawyer will also recommend you document your interactions with your child. For example, if your partner has hostile behaviour or curses a lot, make sure you note it as either video or text (in cases of messages). Gather evidence–as much as you can– to make your case stronger.
5. Misbehave in the Courtroom
It would be best if you keep your emotions and anger in check in court. The judge wants the best for your child. Therefore, if they see you behaving aggressively or rudely, this might impact the final verdict. So, no matter how tense things get in the courtroom, you should never lose your cool.
The opposition will provoke you to show the jury your aggressive side. Giving in could ultimately ruin your case. Therefore, listen to every question and argument and react intelligently. Also, avoid getting into arguments with the other parent. You have hired a lawyer, so let the legal expert do their job.
6. Go for a Trial without Trying to Compromise First
There’s no harm in pushing for a trial to get custody of your child. But, in most cases, parents ca n negotiate and make compromises for the betterment of their children. So, before you go the legal route, sit down and hold negotiations with the other parent and their associates (if necessary).
Many ex-couples also end up co-parenting and negotiating a settlement, allowing them to remain on good terms and care for their children despite not being together. Thus, try various dispute resolution methods. You should push for a trial only when things don’t work out.
7. Involve Your New Partner in the Case
Let’s say you got into a relationship with someone new right after separating from your partner. Now, you need to understand the following:
- Your child is already going through the trauma of their parent’s separation.
- If you introduce your children to your new partner, they probably won’t react positively to the news in such a situation.
- Also, they might end up preferring to live with your ex-partner instead.
So, you must be careful of your children’s fragile minds. Help them heal the trauma of their parent’s separation before you force them to acknowledge even more change.
8. Abuse Drugs or Alcohol
Individuals involved in substance abuse tend to be more aggressive. Hence, if you abuse drugs or alcohol, the judge might give custody of your child to the other parent. After all, your habit is not only harmful to you but can also negatively affect your child’s life.
Do you have a history of substance abuse? Then try your best to give up the habit at least one month before court proceedings. Also, make sure you never consume alcohol or drugs throughout the process. In short, you must show the court you’re responsible, careful, and sober enough to be a parent.
9. Refuse to Participate in the Case
Sometimes, one parent wants to compromise while the other pushes for a trial. In such cases, the latter can make the mistake of refusing to participate. Sure, court cases can be expensive and cause stress, anxiety, anger, and depression. But you can’t ignore it altogether. So if there is a trial, you should participate in it. Otherwise, you’ll miss out on the custody of your child.
10. Lie in Court
Lying in the courtroom is a crime, and you might suffer serious consequences. Everything you say in court and every piece of information you provide should be 100% true. Otherwise, you’ll ruin your credibility. Consequently, the judge will be more inclined to hand over your child’s custody to your ex-partner.
Usually, court officials search for the truth in each parent’s statements throughout the proceedings. When they conclude, they do so after seeing who was more honest and righteous according to the evidence presented. Therefore, you could open yourself to punishment from the judge by lying in court. For instance, they may give you the responsibility of paying the other parent’s legal fees.
Child custody lawsuits can test your emotional composure and intelligence. You’ll have to hire a highly experienced family lawyer to win such cases. As a professional, not only can you earn a lot of money by defending such cases, but you’ll also be able to help a parent keep their children with them.
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